Friday, August 15, 2014

Reflections on my Anonymous Life

Truth be told....I live an anonymous life right now and it's awesome. I'm like a tourist everyday and it's fun! Nobody knows my name here....and I like it that way. No, I love it that way. I have always been very private and over the years I learned how to guard my heart.  However now I find that there is a huge amount of joy in living this travel life less guarded.

This past year has been so therapeutic for me. September 1st will be our one year anniversary of being on the road...nomadic yes, homeless no.  It's like a whole new world opened up and slowly revealed itself over the course of a year.  I slowly let some of my guard down and began living again. Everyday is still revealing more freedom and tranquility that I've never known existed.
My little world was small. My circle of trusted friends was small and it still is... but I needed to get out of that environment.

Since taking up the traveling life... community basically went out the window. Now the people I come in contact with don't know me from Adam and I will most likely never see them again. They are not like me and it's ok. I don't owe them anything and all the pressure of being good enough is lifted from my shoulders. Wow, talk about peaceful.  In public I actually find myself more sociable. I can let my guard down and share my incredible life with them and they find me interesting. I never imagined.

I have experienced some of the most meaningful conversations with strangers since there is no fear of recourse! I'm able to live a more abundant life on every level.  No one to please. No one to win over. No one to judge me. No one to tell me I can't. No one to have to coddle and maintain. Am I accountable for my actions? Yes, even more so now... to myself, my friends, my family and God.

I see now that over the years many relationships proved hindrance to my personal growth. It was a safe necessity and it protected me at the time, or so I thought. The letting go of everything that enslaved me ultimately brought about a different level of living. This truth was something I never saw coming and it really opened my eyes.

 I am such a work in progress and I
see that like never before. I never expected that stepping out of my comfort zone would give me such clear vision and empower me to live the life that I was meant to live.
This year has turned out to be much more than just a gift of sightseeing but a true life lesson on learning about myself and what I really need in this life...on this temporary journey.

I've wrestled with many fears this past year and I'm looking forward to the lessons that are yet to be learned... no matter where the road leads in this great big world... 

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